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What’s your biggest remaining challenge?

Into the 200s now — isn’t it funny what significance we assign to numbers on the scale?

Lost a couple more pounds — Down 26.5# from my highest weight, down about 10# from starting this blog. I was relieved to get past 300. It’s funny how we attribute such meaning to certain numbers. The “round” numbers (no pun intended) are obvious candidates, but here’s my list of meaningful numbers:

  • 325 — highest recorded weight at doctor’s office
  • 308 — this was the max weight on my scale and I was highly embarrassed when I was too fat for my scale
  • 300 — round number, into a new “century”
  • 290 — start of 2nd pg, have been yo-yo-ing between 290 and 305 for years now — enough!
  • 286 — post fat-farm weight and mental block for me, for some reason
  • 275 — start of 1st pg
  • 265 — weight 6 weeks postpartum after 1st birth (was very proud — lowest weight in a long while at that time) AND, get this, source of a stupid huge fight about weight which I then used as an excuse to say “screw it” and promptly gained a bunch (ugh!) The whole story is just unbelievable. I won’t be posting about it. Because then my husband might comment. And then one of us would be sleeping on the couch.
  • I refer to 220-265 as the Big Chasm of Denial
  • 220 — weight at which I generally “see” myself, for some reason, whether fatter or thinner
  • 207 — weight after college — I was shocked to discover I was this fat (OK, I’d kill to be there now — perspective is everything)
  • 200 — weight I swore I’d never go over
  • 175 — when I was a size twelve and felt pretty good about myself after a fairly extreme diet after the 207 shock
  • 150 — weight I lied and said I was when I was really 175 at 16 years old, but 175 then didn’t feel good like 175 after I had dieted down from 207…

Argh!

I probably should have listed these in chronological order instead to illustrate the yo-yo-ness of it all.

So even though I’m not setting conscious big or small weight goals because focusing on the scale freaks me out, my mind already has these anchors that essentially become mini goals. So, 290 is next. But I’m not going to get on a scale for a while. I’m focusing on exercising now.

What are your milestones, your mental blocks, your significant digits, your mini targets?

Or am I the only neurotic one here? Hello? <echo>

Wed, September 10 2008 » Persistence, Progress, Self image

10 Responses

  1. Just_Kelly September 10 2008 @ 6:59 am

    I’m neurotic too!

    225-ish- Highest weight
    178- Wedding Weight (March 2006)
    160- Goal Weight

    I can’t remember anything past that (probably blocked it out!) but I do remember, meeting with my dr when I was in hs for athletic physicals, him taking my weight, saying I was in the 95% but always tacking on the comment “patient is very muscular and has athletic build” as he orated his notes. At the time it was embarassing (I was 16 and wanted to be thin, not the incredible hulk). I wish I was easier on myself then.

  2. Annette September 10 2008 @ 8:27 am

    Numbers are so significant. They keep places in my memory for certain times in my life. The number I felt the strongest at, and although, not the smallest, is what I picked for goal. 160….between marriages, found independence, happily working, feeling sexy and strong :) I was 27. I think the 38/39 version of 160 will be even stronger and sexier because I am wiser :)

  3. Sarah September 10 2008 @ 9:03 am

    I’m so neurotic that I can’t bring myself to admit that the numbers are highly significant.

    OK, I will mention that when I switched to a new scale and magically lost 5 pounds, I enjoyed that FAR MORE than any normal person should. One of the numbers is wrong and obviously nothing changed in the 5 minutes between scales, but my new number is 5 pounds lower.

    Obviously, this leads to not using the Bad Scale any more.

    Signed,

    Neurotic Nelly

  4. Alexia September 10 2008 @ 9:49 am

    Thanks, guys! I’m glad I’m not alone 😀 (Neurotic Nelly, the make of the Good Scale, stat! ;-))

  5. Diana the Scale Junkie September 10 2008 @ 11:37 am

    I’m with you! I have milestones and I can’t wait to get under 300, I think it was the early 90’s the last time I was under 300…I probably won’t get there this year but next year for sure. My next big one is go under 350…then 325 will mark 100 pounds lost but yeah, I really want out of these threes BAD!

  6. Alexia September 10 2008 @ 11:39 am

    Way to go, Diana!!! You can do it!

  7. Cammy September 10 2008 @ 11:54 am

    I didn’t know my weight for about 15 years. I would always close my eyes when I weighed at the doctor’s office and ask them not to tell me what it was. I knew approximately what it was, but not the actual number. My big numbers were 200 (actually, I guess the big number was 199), 179 (a weight I had managed to get to 15 years ago on WW), and now 150 (first goal weight–3+ lbs away).

    Numbers make my head hurt. :)

    congrats on another 2 pounds gone!

  8. Shelley September 10 2008 @ 1:57 pm

    260 was always the weight (non-pregnancy) where I felt really crappy and decided I had to do something. First time it was Atkins. Got down to about 215, felt pretty good about myself. Then Halloween and one mini-Snickers bar did me in. Anyone who’s ever done Atkins knows exactly what I’m talking about.

    Second time, after third baby, post-preg weight of 260 again. Decided to have a Biggest Loser contest with my brother and I lost almost 40 lbs. I feel pretty good around 220. Unfortunately, I have found almost 20 of those lbs again. Sigh. I hate this. I can’t wait to go to the doctor tomorrow and have them tell me I am like 240 again. Although the last time I was there I may have been around 260, so maybe they’ll congratulate me. lol

  9. Marshmallow September 10 2008 @ 2:35 pm

    I don’t know pounds, but 74.2kg was my lowest weight as a 14 year old when I was trying to lose weight, and when I hit below that for the first time, I was ecstatic. 93kg was my highest when I was 16, so naturally, hitting below 90kg and 80kg were neurotic numbers.

    I’m not doing the weight loss thing anymore, so I don’t have numbers on the scale that haunt me. Instead, other numbers haunt me – like 19mins:20seconds to run 3km; THAT one has been haunting me for a while!

  10. admin September 11 2008 @ 6:31 am

    Oh, so I have a whole new number obsession to look forward to, eh, Marshmallow? Greeeeaaaatttt. Well, at least it will be a change 😉

    Shelley, totally know what you mean re: Atkins.

    Thanks, Cammy!

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